380: Stephane Guivarc’h, Newcastle United, Merlin’s Premier League 99 Official Sticker Collection

In 2017 the country musician Brad Paisley released the album 'Love and War' featuring the track 'selfie #theinternetisforever'. The song is a cautionary tale of the historic tweets that have proven the downfall of politicians, English fast bowlers and several prospective employees. However vanilla your Internet activity may have been those lovely people at Meta do like to remind you of your 'memories' whenever you have a look at Facebook. I can only apologise to the contestants of the seventh series of X Factor and Garth Crooks for some of my misguided grumpiness back in 2010 and I should probably pre-emptively resign my future cabinet position on the off-chance Cher Lloyd becomes leader of the opposition.

Occasionally this feature does unearth a more fascinating moment from the past. In September 2011 I was one of a mere five thousand people to witness Calvin Andrew score for Crystal Palace in a 2-1 League Cup win over Middlesbrough. While there is a precedent for miracles occurring around a crowd of that size the yearly reminder that the former Luton Town striker did actually find the back of the net once in his nine appearances that season is always a surprise. Andrew was a classic Palace non-goalscoring striker and across four seasons scored only three other goals in his 66 appearances. This is no big surprise for a man who managed just 46 in the 470 games of his career.

Perhaps there was some logic behind Neil Warnock bringing Andrew to Selhurst Park in 2008. Just ten years earlier France had won the World Cup in their own backyard despite forward Stephane Guivarc'h contributing no goals in the tournament in his role as his nation's main striker. The forward was regularly selected ahead of Cristophe Dugarry and David Trezeguet off the back of his impressive club form where he had won the Ligue 1 Golden Boot in 1996/97 with Stade Rennais and again with Auxerre in 1997/98 as well as finishing as top scorer in that season's UEFA Cup. While Guivarc'h failed to find the net on the global stage he was credited for his hold up play and work rate creating space for the likes of Thierry Henry, Zinedine Zidane and Youri Djorkaeff to work their magic.

Clearly desperate to provide some support for the increasingly burdened Alan Shearer, and like so many overexcited managers following a major tournament, Kenny Dalglish shelled out £3.5m to bring Guivarc'h to Newcastle United. Before he had even started a game Dalglish had been given the boot and replaced by Ruud Gullit. Guivarc'h did score on his debut but, unfortunately for both him and the Magpies, Michael Owen banged in a hattrick as Liverpool left St James's Park with a 4-1 win. He played just three more games before being sold on to Glasgow Rangers in November 1998. Within two days north of the border he had scored twice against St Johnstone but only played a bit part in a treble winning campaign. At the end of the season he returned to Auxerre.

Back on his happy hunting ground he scored a quarter century of goals in two seasons before finishing his career at former club Guingamp in 2002. In total he managed 147 goals in 304 league appearances at a rate of just under a goal every other game as well as a World Cup winner's medal, league titles in France and Scotland and a coveted Intertoto Cup victory. His legacy was ensured when France won the World Cup in 2018 as the ludicrously handsome Olivier Giroud played a similar role playing in Kylian Mbappe and Antoine Griezmann without scoring himself albeit Giroud looked a lot sexier doing it.

Remembering Stephane Guivarc'h as a flop at both club and international level due to a lack of goals across a few months in 1998 is completely unfair to a man who was clearly a talented striker and, more importantly, an unselfish one. He may not have become a household name on Tyneside but was more a victim of the club's questionable post-Keegan management than the failure he was subsequently presented as. Most importantly whenever anyone looks back to France's success in 1998 Guivarc'h, like a questionable social media post, will be there.