126: Dean Gordon, Crystal Palace, Merlin’s Premier League 95 Sticker Collection

Towards the end of 2021 I had the privilege of taking part in the HTO Podcast’s Big Fat Football Quiz. I’m proud to say that I finished in second by a solitary point and was well behaved enough not to suggest any hasty rematches or that we met up to see if I could lob a kettle over the roof of a pub. This is more down to the fact that I completely forgot Lionel Messi and Inter Milan existed rather than any deep-seated chivalry. Suffice to say it was a lot of fun and a great test of football trivia with the added bonus of references to Brian Deane, Barnsley in the Premier League and Homes Under The Hammer star Dion Dublin.

One question focused on Premier League penalty takers and brought up the name of Leighton Baines (I bet he thought this post was about him). During his time with Wigan Athletic and Everton the left back scored an impressive twenty goals from the spot but is not the only defender to feature in the list of those to convert more than ten top flight spot kicks since 1992. David Unsworth scored 22 and Julian Dicks leathered in fifteen suggesting that having a fullback with a foot like a traction engine provided more than just defensive solidity. Back in the halcyon days of the 1990s Crystal Palace were no different with academy graduate Dean Gordon matching his defensive nous with a penchant for spectacular goals and precision from the penalty spot.

Having started off as a winger Gordon established himself in the Crystal Palace first team at left back in the 1993/94 season where the Eagles bounced back from relegation in the inaugural Premier League season with a convincing run to the First Division title. Gordon chipped in with five goals in the league and one more in the League Cup but failed to find the net in the far more exciting Anglo-Italian Cup against famous Serie A sides Millwall and Charlton Athletic. He managed three goals in all competitions in 1994/95 as Palace reached the semi-finals of the FA Cup and League Cup but suffered relegation from the Premier League. Said relegation resulted in the departure of the likes of Gareth Southgate, John Salako and Chris Armstrong and left returning manager (Sir) Steve Coppell with a very different looking squad than the one which had yo-yoed between the top two tiers of English football.

Despite an inauspicious start to the 1995/96 campaign the Eagles reached the play-off final only to fall foul of Steve Claridge’s ropey shin volley in the last minute of extra time. Gordon reached new goalscoring heights with eight goals across the season including a first half hat-trick against West Bromwich Albion in December 1995. Two of these goals, naturally, came from the penalty spot but, as Gordon himself noted in a programme interview in 2020, “they all counted for Shearer and Lineker so why not me?!” It was in the following season that I enjoyed my first trips to Selhurst Park where a Neil Shipperley inspired 1-0 victory over Charlton and a 2-0 win against Norwich City were amongst the impressive results that helped Palace back into the play-off mix albeit with more enjoyable results. In the latter Gordon was once again on the scoresheet with a powerfully struck penalty kick and, rose tinted eight-year old glasses aside, I do not think I have seen a ball hit with such venom since.

Which brings us neatly to Boxing Day 1997. Upon their return to the Premier League Palace developed an aversion to winning at home and found themselves precariously positioned above the relegation zone. With the game against Southampton at 1-1 the Eagles were awarded a penalty in the 71st minute in front of a suitably raucous Holmesdale Road stand featuring the vast majority of the Hawks family. The usually reliable Dean Gordon was nearby, however, Bruce Dyer had looked to balance the fact that you can’t be offside from a penalty by taking over spot kick duties. This was not a major cause of anxiety as Dyer had converted 100% of his penalties for Palace so far but confusion set in when Itzik Zohar jostled the striker out of the way and wrestled the ball from his hands. Apparently Zohar was desperate to “save his Crystal Palace career” following a £1.2m move from Beitar Jerusalem. Instead he rolled the ball tamely to Paul Jones and was shipped off to Maccabi Haifa and regularly tops polls of the Eagles’ worst foreign signings. Considering this season featured cameos of sorts from the likes of Tomas Brolin and Michele Padovano this is a damning indictment.

The game ended 1-1, Palace were relegated by a distance and Dean Gordon moved to newly promoted Middlesbrough for £900,000 ahead of the 1998/99 season. He was an ever present in his first campaign at the Riverside, scoring three goals, and Boro finished ninth upon their return to the top flight. Having racked up over 300 appearances for his first two clubs Gordon entered into a journeyman career after 2001 representing eighteen league and non-league sides in England, Cyprus and New Zealand before retiring in 2009. Since then he has worked for Show Racism The Red Card and Futsal Sunderland while his son Nathan Wood has come through the ranks at Middlesbrough. With a total of 32 goals from defence Dean Gordon’s record is not to be sniffed at. There’s every chance he could be a useful quiz question answer in the future too.