581: Phil Jones, England, FIFA World Cup Russia 2018, Panini Official Licensed Sticker Album

Mat Jolin-Beech takes a look today at a man who has taken the phrase “express yourself” very literally during his time representing Blackburn Rovers, Manchester United and England. Football is a sport after all and the looks of its players are pretty irrelevant. For every David Beckham there’s a Steve Ogrizovic. But then again there’s also Phil Jones. Over to Mat.

More than ten years on from his debut, Chris Samba said the hype around his former teammate was fully justified. After less than 50 games for Blackburn Rovers, a £16.5 million deal saw one Philip Anthony Jones swap Ewood Park for Old Trafford. Touted as the new Duncan Edwards, there was certainly a lot of chat around the centre back with even thoughts he had the technique and temperament to play as a deep lying midfielder.

That promise seems to have been lost. Stuck on a miserly £75,000 a week (how does he cope?), blighted by injuries, frozen out of Solskjaer’s first team plans, and with a face that has spawned a million memes. But how things could have been different.

The one time I have seen Jones play live I was reasonably impressed. That was about the only thing that did impress me that day. Let’s wind the clock back to 15 November 2011. In what would turn out to be Fabio Capello’s last game in charge of the English national team, a mere 47,000 fans turned up for a pre-European Championships friendly.

Jones joined the mighty Gareth Barry and Jack Rodwell in midfield in a 4-3-3 formation. John Terry had returned to the team sheet, despite accusations he had racially abused Anton Ferdinand.  Bobby Zamora led the line and faced up against Olof Mellberg. Even the presence of Zlatan couldn’t enlighten this dreary game. It did however include England’s 2,000th goal. But even that failed to be glamorous. An own goal by Daniel Majstorovic which was later awarded to Barry.

Jones did impress. He played fairly well, got about the pitch, and seemed to have a bright future ahead of him. I was hopeful United’s new signing could deliver. However, it was not to be. The day provided two great analogies for Jones’ career since then.

The first came on the way to the game. Rushing through St Pancras with my Dad to get the tube, we made a quick stop off at the M&S to get some food. A reduced bacon sarnie looked ideal as something to get us through to half time. On the tube, we split the sandwich, only to find that it was made of disintegrating bread. We were left holding lettuce wrapped around soggy bacon. We didn’t realise it was gluten free bread. Huge promise but ultimately massive disappointment.

The second came as we were waiting at Wembley Park station after the game. We tried to make the most of the underwhelming match. We’d seen England win; we’d seen the 2,000th goal live; we’d been to the New Wembley; and we’d had a couple of (expensive) beers. Waiting for the tube to arrive, commotion on the opposite platform. A Three Lions’ fan obviously enjoyed the half time refreshments so much he wanted to share them with everyone else on the platform. Luckily, the tube arrived before we witnessed too much of the spewing.

Sadly for Phil Jones, a career that has had, and I’m sure will have, many good points and highlights, has underwhelmed and sticks in the memory for the wrong reasons. At least he’s provided a wealth of memes. He did however wear some lime green Nike boots – like all the greats of the game.