369: Cuauhtemoc Blanco, Mexico, Panini World Cup France 98

Playground football should be a sport in its own right. Undefined pitch limits and numbers of players allow for a more inclusive game where the ability to kick the ball really far outweighs such overrated skills such as sublime ball control or explosive pace. Playing in smart school shoes and trousers negate the mod cons of modern football boots and again benefit those whose main talent is booting the ball as far away from their own goal as possible. Moreover, a focus on recreating either the most impressive, or funniest, moments of the most recent round of professional fixtures rather than actually scoring goals makes for a much more entertaining spectacle for the fans (by which I mean the girl in your GCSE DT class you’re trying to impress but who, for some reason, has better things to do than watch you be crap at football at lunchtime).

 

The FIFA World Cup held in France in the summer of 1998 provided several such moments for playground footballers to attempt on the tarmac arenas across Britain. Dennis Bergkamp’s incredible winner against Argentina gave thousands of youthful exponents of the game the excuse to smash the ball forward from inside their own half repeatedly until they grew frustrated with their classmates’ ineptitude in bringing the ball down on the edge of the six yard box. In said classmates’ defence it wasn’t their fault that these passes had sailed miles over their heads into someone’s back garden. The same match saw Ariel Ortega provide the more vertically challenged with an excuse to attempt to headbutt opposition goalkeepers/much taller kids in the year above before feigning innocence to nearby referees/dinner ladies. And then there was Mexican forward Cuauhtemoc Blanco.

During his nation’s opening Group E fixture against South Korea Blanco collected a pass on the left wing, drew in two defenders, trapped the ball between his feet and jumped between his opponents before delivering a fairly awful cross which was deflected away from danger. Not content with this outcome he attempted the trick again a few minutes later ahead of laying the ball back to a team-mate who duly lost possession. Despite the complete lack of influence Blanco’s showboating had on Mexico’s eventual 3-1 victory a star was born and the very next day playgrounds around the world witnessed countless recreations of ‘the Cuauhtemina’ as the trick came to be known.

 

Despite being relatively easy to perform and, let’s be blunt, pretty useless ‘the Cuauhtemina’ has gone down in history. Tap ‘L2’ playing any of the classic FIFA games on the PS1 and any player is capable of performing one (ideally over an onrushing goalkeeper). Ahead of the 2018 World Cup in Russia American broadcaster Fox Sports placed the move at no.97 in their list of Most Memorable World Cup moments. Blanco himself continued to use the trick throughout his career which took in stints in his native Mexico, Spain and the USA.  How much it contributed to his 217 club career goals is debatable.

 

Blanco is widely regarded as one of the best Mexican footballers of all time which seems fair when you add in the 39 goals in an impressive 120 caps earned over a 19 year international career to the aforementioned club achievements. He now serves his country in a very different way as Governor of the state of Morelos although a poll released in January 2020 rated him as the second-worst state governor in Mexico. Clearly a more popular presence on the football pitch than in the world of politics then. However, by performing a brief feat of ultimately pointless trickery, he earned his place in the hearts and feet of countless playground footballers around the world. Now just imagine if that girl from your DT class had seen you pull of ‘the Cuauhtemina’ on a Tuesday lunchtime.