513: James Harper, Reading, Merlin’s F.A. Premier League Official Sticker Collection 2007

Today Emlyn Jones brings us the story of a criminally underrated player who provided both of us with a whole host of ridiculous catchphrases during our university days. Our housemates suffered enough as it was but James Harper provided us with even more reasons to be annoying which shouldn’t have really been possible. I don’t think Emlyn was ever forgiven by one of them for deleting Emile Heskey from the England team on Euro 2000 on the PS1 and replacing him with the midfield maestro. For what it’s worth I thought it was funny – almost as funny as the superfluous reference to ‘Crystanbul’ in the post below. Thanks for that one mate.

Having discussed international goalkeepers to date, I feel it’s time to talk about my favourite player for my hometown club, Reading. A tale of ping-pong, captains legbands and why I hate both Brendan Rodgers and Danny Murphy to this day. The pricks.

Arsenal trainee James Harper signed for Reading in February 2001 for a fee of £400,000, a significant sum for a club that wouldn’t break the million pound barrier on a player until 2005, particularly given he had only three loan appearances at Cardiff City under his belt. He grew into an ever present over the following seasons, culminating in promotion to the Premier League for the first time in Reading’s history in 2006, with a points tally of 106, a record to this day.

Reading’s first season was an enormous success, and Harper played every game as Steve Coppell’s team finished eighth. Bizarrely for a starting player and vice-captain (wearing the armband on his leg in garter style when required) of such a successful team, Harper received a weekly wage of only £1,500. It was only when former Royals’ boss (and dance sensation) Alan Pardew tried to sign him for West Ham United that he discovered quite how underpaid he was. It’s not recorded how much his pay rise was, but I assume it was significantly better than the £500 extra a week he was initially offered. Despite this, he confirmed recently that the pay rise made little difference to his everyday life; he entrusted his wages directly to his financial adviser and would often end the month “with, like, £7 in my bank account”.

Sadly, the following season was less of a success, and Reading entered the final game at Derby County needing a win, and hoping Fulham could only draw. Despite a stunning strike from Harper and a 4-0 win, a Danny Murphy goal condemned the Royals to relegation. Always good value in interviews, Harper commented that on the flight home from Derby he had wished the plane would crash.

Harper’s time at Reading was ended in 2010, when new boss Brendan Rodgers decided he did not fit in with his style, and loaned him out to Sheffield United, fully admitting that with Harper in the last year of his contract he had likely played his last game for the club. Rodgers’ new style of football resulted in the Royals sitting in twenty-first place and his departure in January.

I still despise Rodgers for selling Harper. His Swansea side beating Reading in the play-offs a season later did nothing to ease my hatred. After Steven Gerrard slipped over in 2014, the true moment that denied Liverpool the title was a later game. I know that I sent Manny a congratulatory text message when his team, Crystal Palace, fought back to an unlikely 3-3 draw, effectively denying Liverpool the title. I also know that it contained no fewer than three expletives directed at Rodgers.

Despite playing at the top level, central midfield was not a position in which the English national side were deficient. Harper did turn down the opportunity to play for the country of his mother’s birth, Ghana; his reasoning being that he had never been there, and further didn’t know what colour their flag was. A shame, it being one of the snazzier ones. He did, however, star at the Royal Albert Hall in a celebrity table-tennis match alongside Jonathan Edwards. His scintillating form prompted him to be given a tiny bat, resulting in the eventual loss to Glenn Hoddle and John Barnes.

Harper eventually became something of a journeyman, moving to Hull City, where he was inexplicably despised by the fans, one even refusing to serve him in WH Smith. His teams since include Doncaster Rovers, Basingstoke, Hendon, Met Police, and currently non-league Uxbridge, among many others. Harper has expressed a wish to go into coaching when he finally hangs up his boots. Presumably football, though if not, perhaps there will be a resurgence in the English table-tennis side’s fortunes…